WHAT PERFUME YOU NEED AND WHY
Buying perfume or cologne is a personal and often EXPENSIVE investment, that speaks volumes about your character and what kind of being you are. Any perfume-buyer will want to make sure that their hard-earned money gets them something with longevity, class, and a pretty bottle (duh, that’s a given). Today, I’m going to list some of my favourite scents and scenarios that they’d suit, and hopefully with my help you’ll become a stronger, better smelling babe who can take on the world.
1. You’re the uni or school student who wants that sweet yet uninterested boy in your class to notice you
For anyone, boy or girl, who’s aiming to snag themself a cute relationship and couple Instagrams to make every single individual roll in jealousy, this one is a timeless classic. Philosykos is a delicious blend of figs as well as cedar and wood, and from my experiences boys (gay or straight) LOVE the smell of nature. It must just be a boy thing. This scent will spark the boy who always acts occupied or uninterested when you ask him lame questions in class to realise that you’re actually a queen and the straw to his berry, and before you know it you’ll be sending out handmade invitations to your wedding in the Hunter Valley. Trust me on this.
PHILOSYKOS Eau de Parfum by Diptyque, $177 for 75 mL, Mecca Cosmetica
Image from Mecca.com.au
2. You’re the sweetheart turned party girl/boy who wants to forget about your recently failed relationship, big time
After that adorable romance listed before fails when you find your now-ex partner snogging your ex-BFF at the wedding after-party, you need something that’ll make him gag and roll in regret when you have your Bella Hadid/The Weeknd moment – walking past him, wearing winged eyeliner and looking smolderingly sexy, with Sorry by Beyoncé coincidentally playing in the background. Velvet Orchid by Tom Ford (AKA the king of fragrance), with its’ scintillating and opulent sweet floral and rum scent, is for anyone who’s a low-key vixen, wears all black all day, drinks vodka like it’s water, and is here for a good time, NOT a sensible time.
VELVET ORCHID by Tom Ford, $130 for 30mL, David Jones
Image from DavidJones.com.au
3. You’re the boho Byron babe who’s switched to only fluoride-free water and would rather eat non-organic than get vaccinated
How else are you going to be taken seriously at yoga class if you don’t smell like an ethereal sun goddess with an all natural tan? Aesop’s Tacit, with top notes of refreshing and earthy basil and citrus, is a unisex scent that will have your friends SHOOK whenever they come over to try your new kale salad with kombucha dressing, and accompany you to Camilla to go kaftan shopping. You won’t have felt as refreshed and scintillated since the first day you thought F**K IT, bought Pete Evans’ cookbook and went paleo.
TACIT by Aesop, $110 for 50mL, Aesop stores
Image from Aesop.com.au
4. You’re the career-girl/boy with global ambitions
Face it, you’re an Elon Musk in the making, and you want to make sure everyone knows it. Whether you’re starting off in your first intern job doing the coffee runs or you’re the head of a global organisation, you want something that lets everyone know you’re here and you mean business – that sleep is for the weak, that all of your friendships are literally hanging by a thread due to your marriage to the job (think Andy before the Paris trip in The Devil Wears Prada), and that nobody, not even that other bloody intern who has their eyes on the same prize, can get in your way. The uniqueness and brashness of Inflorescence by Byredo will let practically anyone who’s an obstacle on your path to glory know that you’re better than them – and you like it like that.
INFLORESCENCE by Byredo, $151 for 50mL, Mecca Cosmetica
Image from Mecca.com.au
5. You’re the gorgeous girl who’s unlucky in love and nobody understands why you’re single, but you own three very adorable cats and they make you happy
Maybe you’re just out of a relationship or maybe you never had one, but something about you says you don’t really care. You take life as it comes, and value your me-time – whether that be reading John Green books, sneaking a bottle of pino into a screening of Fifty Shades Darker at the local Hoyts with the girls, or watering your windowsill cactuses that you’ve named Herbert and Frankie. You take life as it comes, and Chanel No. 5 L’Eau, with its’ breezy fruitiness and floral chords, encapsulates your chill-ness and unequivocally peaceful vibes.
NO. 5 L’EAU by Chanel, $123 for 35mL, David Jones
Image from Chanel.com
6. You’re the girl/boy who dropped out of uni to focus on your band’s music career
After studying an intense degree for too long, you’ve finally broken out of your shell (and the norms of society) to focus on your true passion – making hits. After months of rehearsals, listening to Nirvana on repeat, and sharing a lifelong pact with the rest of the band over a backyard campfire, you’re ready to take the independent music scene by storm. Incense: Avignon by Comme des Garçons, with its’ borderline blasphemous scent of incense, will be the perfect companion to your new sleeve of tattoos and your septum piercing, and will assist in making your parents sigh and wonder what in the hell they’ve raised. I mean, you won’t get on to Triple J without a little wow-factor.
INCENSE: AVIGNON by Comme des Garçons, $123 for 50mL, Mecca Cosmetica or Incu
Image from Mecca.com.au
7. You’re someone who simply – shock horror – wants to SMELL NICE
If you’re sick of boringly giving off a scent of Rexona deodorant (or of adolescent angst – but that’s a whole other article) and just want something that brightens your mood and the mood of others around you, well SAY NO MORE FAM. Probably one of my favourite perfumes of all time and an undisputed crowd-pleaser, Pomegranate Noir by Jo Malone is something your mum, significant other, niece, nephew and great-grandmother will equally fawn over. People will stop you in the street, offer you a taxi before them, and want to spend time with you left right and centre. It’s an absolute winner.
POMEGRANATE NOIR by Jo Malone, $98.00 for 30mL, Jo Malone
Image from DavidJones.com.au
xo Jonah
